Cool Quotes Collection
Religious

So, if there's no God, who changes the water?

New Yorker cartoon of two goldfish in a bowl

And Jesus said unto them, "And whom do you say that I am?"

They replied, "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our being, the ontological foundation of the context of our very selfhood revealed."

And Jesus replied, "What?"

Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man really wants to make a million dollars, the best way would be to start his own religion.

Writer Ron Hubbard in 1949
who later founded the Church of Scientology

The worst moment for the atheist is when he is really thankful and has nobody to thank.

Dante Rossetti

He sewed his eyes shut because he is afraid to see
He tries to tell me what I put inside of me
He's got the answers to easy my curiosity
He dreamed a god up and called it Christianity
Your god is dead and no one cares
If there is a hell
I will see you there

Nine Inch Nails, "Heresy"

I call Christianity the *one* great curse, the *one* great intrinsic depravity, the *one* great instinct for revenge for which no expedient is sufficiently poisonous, secret, subterranean, *petty* -- I call it the *one* mortal blemish of mankind.

Friedrich Nietzsche

"The most fatal seductive lie that has yet existed"

Nietzsche about Christianity, "Will to Power"

God is playing a comic to an audience that's afraid to laugh.

Voltaire

Religions are all alike -- founded on fables and mythologies.

Thomas Jefferson

A certain sense of cruelty towards oneself and others is Christian; hatred of those who think differently; the will to persecute. Mortal hostility against the masters of the earth, against the 'noble', that is also Christian; hatred of mind, of pride, courage, freedom, libertinage of mind, is Christian; hatred of the senses, of joy in general, is Christian...

Friedrich Nietzsche

Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet.

Napoleon

If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

King James Bible, Leviticus 20:13

What happens when we're dead? The irony is that all our questions will be answered after we die. We spend our whole life trying to figure out the truth and the only way we'll find out what it is, is to get hit by a bus. And the only comfort that religion offers is that God is driving that bus.

John Ryman, "When Galaxies Collide"

Man is certainly stark mad. He cannot even make a worm, and yet he will be making gods by the dozens.

Montaigne

Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who teaches my hands to wage war, and my fingers to do battle.

The Bible, Psalms 144:1

And I will dash them one against each other, the fathers and the sons, says the Lord. I will not pity or spare or have compassion, that I should not destroy them.

The Bible, Jeremiah 13:14

No god ever gave any man anything, nor ever answered any prayer at anytime, nor ever will.

Madalyn Murray O'Hair

I do not believe in a God of theology who rewards good and punishes evil.

Albert Einstein

This would be the best of all possible worlds if there were no religion in it.

John Adams, 2nd president of the U.S.

What has been the fruits of Christianity? ...Superstition, bigotry and persecution.

James Madison, 4th president of the U.S.

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