Alcohol and calculus don't mix... Don't drink and derive.

Linux is free only if your time is worthless.

To err is human. To really foul things up requires a computer.

Profanity is the one language all programmers know best.

A programmer

Hard Drive: The part of the computer that stops working when you spill beer on it.

Dave Barry

Don't take offense by this, but how old are you? You must be a major geek to sit around in this channel on your computer all day, and on your ASS!
im a bot you fucking idiot

#mp3 on Dalnet

People like you don't belong on IRC.

AK|RA in #poolside on Dalnet

Per section 126.B article 12 of the Information Warfare Bill passed by the senate in 1996 I am reporting you to your ISP.

AK|RA in #poolside on Dalnet

Microsoft: This company has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down. If problem persists please call the Department of Justice.

Debugging tips from the Master, Sherlock Holmes:

"It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Insensibly one begins to twist facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts."

"As a rule, the more bizarre a thing is, the less mysterious it proves to be."

"Perhaps I have trained myself to see what others overlook."

"There is nothing more deceptive than an obvious fact."

"Chance has put in our way a most singular and whimsical problem, and its solution is its own reward."

"I am glad of all details, whether they seem to you to be relevant or not."

Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle